through the eyes of a deviant

tongue like a diamond dagger

Tag Archives: Gamer

chronicles of okc: why i refuse to date gamers

As many of you know, whenever I see a man with a gaming console it’s one of the biggest turn offs for me. You may think it’s a bit hypocritical considering I’m also a gamer. However, the difference is that I have self control and I actually crave for human interaction – most of the guys that I’ve encountered who are gamers don’t have self control, are very dependent on video games when dealing with their problems, have dangerous addictions to gaming, and actually don’t care for much human interaction.

I’ve had two horrible experiences with gamers in the dating world. One I dated for a year and a half and that promptly ended when his inability to interact with other people that aren’t gamers made him more and more reclusive and eventually he decided that all he needed was video games. The second one I dated for a year; his mother and I were concerned about the gaming addiction he had developed since childhood. His father neglected him and his only consolation was gaming. Even to this day he’ll put gaming before friends and family, and his addiction and our effort to help him with it made him lash out, cheat on me, and then alienate most of his friends.

I find that gamers tend to lack the emotional and social maturity that I need in a man. *shrugs*

This, very simply, is why I don’t date gamers. Period. This is my preference and I have my right to it. There’s far more that goes into both of these situations but it’s too personal to talk about here, you’d have to go to my personal weblog for that.

While I don’t really use OKC anymore, I did have a disclaimer up there saying that I don’t date gamers. I didn’t elaborate, why should I have to? Just know if you spend hours with a controller in your hand you’re not the one for me, get over it.

Well this one boy couldn’t get over it, as you can see by our conversation.

Him: Bummer on the not dating gamers bit. I mean, really, who is to say that one person’s hobby is superior to another’s? That’d be like saying “I don’t date movie watchers” or “I don’t date book readers”.

I once read a profile of a girl who said “I won’t date a man who watches sports”; now I’m not particularly interested in sports… but really? Must be nice to be in a position to make such a demand.

(Sidenote: yes I am in that position to make that demand, and it is nice. As amazing of a person AND girlfriend I am to every single person I’ve dated, if you want to get this 10 you need to be a 10, it’s that damn simple. I demand what I want, and nothing less. )

Me: It’s not about putting one hobby over another, I’m just not interested in dating children.

Him: A bit presumptuous to assume that one’s hobby makes them a child, no? And really, who are you to say what constitutes an adult? I have a damn good career, I pay my bills on time, I have excellent credit, I live alone currently but have lived with 3 different women; oh, and I happen to enjoy a video game or two. Hey, if all of that is indicative of a child then sign me up. Thanks for playing.

Me: This little rant of yours proves your lack of maturity and displays all of your insecurities. No matter what you say, I don’t date gamers.

“Thanks for playing.”

Really? Did I ask for your attention? You came to ME, it’s about time you got over yourself. After losing a child and a marriage to a gaming addiction do you really fucking think I give two shits about your shit career, your credit score or your exes? Think fucking again cunt because I fucking don’t. And don’t think for one fucking second that you paying a bill or having a job all of a sudden makes you mature enough for me.

You’ve been dismissed.

Clearly he didn’t know who the fuck he was talking to. Piling on the reasons for why I don’t date gamers – emotional immaturity for the lose.

the dilemma of a female gamer

I’m a female, and I’m a “gamer.”

By “gamer,” I suppose I aim to imply that games are not at all foreign to me; I find interest in and clearly do achieve whatever is to be done within every game I come across that catches my attention. I know the lingo, I appreciate the work it takes into creating a game, I recognize I was born in the age of certain games that today’s are based on.

In short, when it comes to games, I know what I’m talking about.

But to most gamers, seeing another one that’s a female is often too much to handle. Why? Because gamers don’t interact with other people, much less females. Hence why they’re fascinated with us.

For the record it’s really obnoxious to see guys put us up on a pedestal for not only being capable of picking up a controller and using it well, but having a vagina at the same time. You’re pretty much saying we’re overcoming an inadequacy, a handicap if you will.

And it’s also really irritating to see girls like the Frag Dolls pretty much riding that stereotype to a life of irrelevant and inconsequential e-fame. The Frag Dolls themselves are only famous because of their skill in combination with their vagina, and while it’s a direct challenge to a male dominated area I feel like, as a woman, there are so many more important things we could be conquering.

As an avid gamer I’ve gone through all the reactions that I think another female gamer could go through – I’ve been hit on, harassed, banished, put up on a pedestal, stalked, etc. If I do well in a game I either get guys that are surprised for some reason or I get people bent on making my life a living hell; in short everyone’s insecurities about women tend to come out on Xbox Live and the PSN.

And here we have the dilemma.

If you play anonymously, you’re ugly, fat, and you smell funny.

If you openly show yourself and you’re not up to the video game standard of flawless physical appearance then you’re “the ugliest bitch they’ve ever seen in their lives.”

If you openly show yourself and you’re quite attractive, you’re a fake because hot chicks don’t play video games.

If you’re attractive and ignore the advances of snotty pimple faced gamers you must be a snob/bitch/whore and therefore must be hated because you clearly go for the type of guy that they’ll always envy – the jock.

If you have a boyfriend, this must not be your Xbox live account, it has to be his.

If you get attacked and it really doesn’t bother you, you must be crying on the inside.

If you respond to the haters then you’re incapable of dealing with e-trolls and you’ve just now become the aggressor, how dare you talk back to twelve year olds?

If you’re overweight, that’s all you’ll ever be.

If you’re thin you must be starving yourself and therefore are blatantly insulting other women.

No matter what type of in game achievements you have, what gear you’re wearing, or what gun you’re toting, you’re a noob and shouldn’t be dumb enough to do what you’re doing.

In short, if you threaten the stereotypical male persona you’re a bitch and you need to be destroyed.

It’s why whenever someone yells at me for being absent from a game I promptly inform them that I was painting my nails and watching Sex and the City with the girls, or that I was busy having sex, or something along those lines.

Now who’s up for a dance off on the Wii??

p/s: Gamers the Wii was invented for you to get OFF your ass and stop having health problems, don’t let me catch you playing Wii tennis sitting down. Ass clowns.